This is not proof-read as it's time for night prayer and sleep. Aaah, I'm learning self-discipline.
I am enjoying the book very much. I read several chapters today. The first chapter is about finding God through art. One grandson is majoring in violin at university; it was through his talent that he found Christ. He told me that to have such talent has to be a gift and that gift could only come from God. It opened his eyes to faith. He chose to become Anglican because of the friendliness of the people at that parish near his home and some of his friends attended there. As his grandmother, I have bragging rights: he started playing at age 12, which is quite old to start as most children start prior to kindergarten. A couple years later and he was in the city's junior symphony; by 10th grade he was in all-state orchestra playing first chair; by 12th grade, he was the only high school student in one of the city's symphonies. As a sophomore in university, if I remember what my son said correctly, he is third position of first chair and the two violinists who outrank him are doctoral students. Thoughts of my grandson flitted through my mind quite often while reading this chapter. I would have loved to have read it together and heard his comments as a budding musician and Christian. Bragging rights ending and back to the wonderful book.
BEAUTY
p. 106-107 I am always brought to tears when I hear a marvelous performance followed by a standing ovation. I feel that at the climax of our cheering, we cross a boundary and unwittingly begin applauding some other reality, a performer we know is there but who cannot be seen. We want to thank Beauty itself. Let me be bold for a moment. Is it possible that during this evening's performance we unconsciously sensed Someone standing behind the beautiful Someone who is its source, and we were moved to praise him as well? I am a musicologist, but I am also an ordained priest in the Church of England. For years I have tried to separate the different hats I wear, but I have been quite unsuccessful, so if you will indulge me, I would like to conclude my remarks this evening by suggesting that there is a distinct relationship between beauty and the heart's search for God.
When I hear beautiful music, I often sense God, but I had never thought of beauty being part of my search for God and one of the arrows that point me to new ways deeper into God. Although I dabble on a few instruments, there are times I feel lost in my music and feel free in God. As a child, sometimes Mom would "punish" me by making me sit at the piano and play because she knew whatever was bothering me would be expelled through making music. It still works that way for me - very soothing, calming and ... now I have words to explain it: it points me back to God like a homing device.
p. 106 The object of all great art is beauty, and it makes us nostalgic for God.
I agree. I'd never thought of being nostalgic for God; but somewhere deep inside where God lives and breathes within me, (Romans 8.11) I become nostalgic and hungry to know that fuller unity with Him once again. The prayer of silence reminds me my Lord is there - living and breathing inside of me. I hadn't connected that beauty often feels the same - a combination of knowing and yearning and wanting to fall into God's outstretched arms of Love with no shame, guilt or embarrassment - but with abandonment.
p. 106 People living in the post modern world, however, are faced with an excruciating dilemma. Their hearts long to find ultimate meaning, while at the same time their critical minds do not believe it exists. We are homesick, but have no home. So we turn to the arts and aesthetics to satisfy our thirst for the Absolute. But if we want to find our true meaning in life, our search cannot end there. Art or beauty is not the destination; it is a signpost pointing towards our desired destination.
There have been times when I've been homesick; but even in the midst of family and loved ones, my logic said I was responding bizarrely. But the Bible says He sticks closer than a brother (Proverbs 18:24); and when I lose that sense of unity with God, maybe that is the times when I feel lonely instead of the peace of solitude.
p. 109 The imagination.... was the source of all kinds of evil ideas and impulses. And, to some degree, that is true. The depraved imagination has the capacity to dream up all sorts of dreadful things.... We did not recognize that the redeemed imagination was capable of producing works of beauty that revealed the Glory.
Wow.
p. 110 All beauty is subversive; it flies under the radar of people's critical filters and points them to God. ....... Art, music, dance, theater, literature, film. ..... They're spiritual languages that communicate truths about God that human language doesn't have words to express. That's why the church needs to rediscover them.
Wow again!
PEACE
p. 131 What would it look like for Christians to train themselves to be peacemakers with the same rigor and discipline that soldiers train for war?
As I look back over my 37 years of calling myself a Christian, many of the times I've wanted to be a peacemaker were times when I wanted to prove myself right to the point the other person would chose to believe like I did so there would be no discord and peace would be the result. Pompous, egotistical and rude behavior on my part; but it was the only way I knew. I'm glad I've learned to listen to other people's story with respect and maybe ask a few questions to clarify what I think I'm hearing. I'm still learning to listen quietly without formulating a reply or trying to manipulate or interrupt; but at least I'm finally recognizing that is a weak area that I need to strengthen. I'm learning to tell my story without adding too many hooks trying to get people into doing things my way spiritually. That doesn't mean I'm not still struggling with making healthy boundaries so the love can poor through and my dysfunction and co-dependent areas stay in my own space. How did I learn to listen without judging or jumping to conclusions? Because the people of my parish treated me with that type of respect and dignity - which helped me listen to their story; then we could enjoy the common grounds and build from that foundation.
p. 133 If we want to be peacemakers, we have to confront the wounds and darkness in our own hearts first--otherwise we will always be blaming others for our problems instead of looking at ourselves. ... You are always your biggest problem.
It took several years of 12-step work and counseling to recognize I'm my biggest liability and my biggest asset. Some people can go through things that make my life look like a kindergarten picnic and they have peace and joy and open connectedness - very humble people. Other people can have a small set back and be devastated for decades. I'm a mixture of both; depending on how I interpret the magnitude of the injury. But it's my response to what happened, much more than what happened, that determines how quickly I pop back to peace and joy that permeate my heart and life. It is good to know that because I can't change the other person, but I (with God's help) can change my response to an offense.
p. 136 I realized that I've confused being a peace lover with being a peacemaker. A peace lover is someone who enjoys the absence of conflict, but a peacemaker is someone who is proactively engaged in works of reconciliation in every sphere of life, from the personal to the global.
Ouch. That stepped on my toes. I'm blessed that I could view my lay ministry as a style of personal peacemaking.
p. 137 Francis, your genius was that you read stuff in the Bible (like the Sermon on the Mount) and you didn't spiritualize or theologize it. You heard Jesus say, "Happy are the peacemakers," so you got up every day and embarked on a new peace mission. My usual approach is to read the Bible, try to understand what it's saying, and then apply it. Your formula was the reverse. You applied the Bible and then came to a fresh understanding of what it actually meant. What a concept.
Very interesting. I'm one of those "I can't apply it until I understand it." But this paragraph speaks to me of using analysis as a way to procrastinate; and quick acceptance (without understanding) as a way to enjoy more simplicity. A 12-step slogan that goes with it "the paralysis of analysis." This is all typed by a woman who has been procrastinating for several years on writing a book... I was grateful to read this and accept it as a way to tweak my life so I can enjoy the blessings of following Jesus without the anchor of analysis keeping me chained down.
PREACHING
p. 147 He avoided preaching doctrines and dogma, because he believed conversion happened more on the plane of experience than reason.
I agree. It makes sense: how can I expect my mind to grasp spiritual things; yet my mind is imperative to help carry out the things the heart easily grasps, understands and longs for. Putting words into the mouth of Paul in 1 Cor 13 - maybe seeing in the mirror darkly is when I try to grasp with my mind or have my mind try to instruct my spirit; but seeing face to face is when I look first with my spirit and let my spirit teach my mind. That's just off the cuff and a new thought - I may revisit it later... and maybe not.
p. 147 Shalom (Hebrew word that is often translated into peace in English) is a deep harmony with the universe. When sin entered the world, it ruptured the friendship we'd once had with God, with other people, with ourselves, with our bodies, and with the environment. Our spiritual, social, psychological, physical and ecological relationships were fractured. Francis preached a gospel that was holistic. He wanted his hearers to have all those torn dimensions of their lives repaired. Conversion was about being reconciled and restored in every aspect of life. For
Francis, that could only happen through the blood of Jesus, living by
the words of Scripture and conforming our lives to the gospel.
I like that. I know that Christ came not only for "fire insurance" but for abundant life... whole life... unified life. Just as the Trinity is in perfect unity - it sets an example of the unity available to my own fractured life.
p. 148 He was so animated that people called him the living tongue. Instead of the gloomy preaching that prevailed in those days, Francis's sermons were hilarious. Best of all, he commanded the friars to keep their sermons brief because the Lord himself kept his words short on earth.
For the sake of length, I didn't type the paragraphs of the fun examples he used that would have been shocking to many. But I can see how his short sermons with great visuals would have had sticking power that people could have carried home and chewed until it digested into a changed life. Most of Jesus' sermons were like that. One of the first ones I think of is "Follow me and I will make you fishers of men..." What a catch-all to say that to professional fishermen. I'm sure that would have got their mind going until they were compelled to follow to see what it was about.
p. 149 Francis was more than an entertaining street preacher. he didn't want to win people to faith through theological arguments or by reasoning with them. His way of evangelizing people was through the example of his own life. That's what gave his simple words so much gravity and impact. His life was his theology. He once said, "It is no use walking anywhere to preach unless our walking is our preaching." He also said, "Preach the gospel at all times and when necessary use words."
I'd like that to happen in my life. To have people see my actions and behavior and recognize Christ in me to the point it made a change in their life. As I reflect on my Christian walk, there have been times I've had an "Aha!" moment during a sermon when something came to me in a real way that changed my life; there has been a few times when I had an epiphany during a conversation with somebody I was talking to. But there have been two or three people who's consistent life of joy and holiness showed Christ in them and gave me hope and that hope turned my life around. Unsung heroes - which is how people who are humble enough to be used in that way would prefer it. Yet, there have been more times when I've seen God in nature and felt Him stir within me and walked away a changed woman.
p. 154 I grew up in a faith that was highly individualistic. We talked about personal -- personal evangelism, personal relationship with Christ, personal devotions, etc. We enjoyed "fellowship," but we never talked much abou the power of community and how it could change individual lives and the world. This idea of the church being an "as if" people who live together like the kingdom were "already here in its fullness" is inspiring to me.
Wow. Over the past year or so, I have become interested in studying communal living, not as a religious order, but as secular, or non-ordained people who love God and want to live like the Christians in Acts. I have enjoyed the teachings of Shane Claiborne and other young people who are living that type of life. As I begin my journey to understand Franciscan spirituality; I think if he was alive today, he would have joined them, lead them or at least cheered them on.
__________________
I feel rather silly tracking my daily office publicly. It's not to brag of my desire to do this or self-pity at my meager successes of getting them all done - and we won't even think about the times I'm inattentive or begrudging as I do it. But I chose to do this publicly to give myself the accountability I need until the prayers are ingrained into my daily life and I look forward to them and doing them feels natural, joyful and participatory. The inner attitude may eventually become part of the accountability - but right now, I'm just working on showing up for the office.
Since I worked today and is work too far away to run home for lunch, I did all except the noon prayer. Since I slept a lot yesterday, I woke up at 5:30 and spent some time with God, then got up and did the office and had leisure to enjoy my morning. I decided to discipline myself to get to bed earlier so I have time to go about my morning routine unrushed and relaxed. Thus, I may decide to be accountable on this blog as I incorporate this new skill into my schedule.
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